Tuesday, June 17, 2014

For a too long while,

So I took a super long hiatus since January and ditched this place for a treacherous semester that has finally ended. #phew

&I'm in my final semester. Can't wait to finish off this semester and start working. Love the student lifestyle but absolutely hate the poorness of it. :( 


Missed my face right! Hehe. Took this super model-like photo in Osaka that I went during my break!! Was super stoked before going to Japan and it sure did live well and beyond my expectations. ����

And, I decided to pick up Dota2 after so much procrastination and I'm an addict. Still noobie but my reaction is much better nao. I like how everybody starts from 0 and you can't buy better stats unlike most games. It feels more fair this way. Like you're really playing because you're good and not cause you can afford to. Now I feel like getting up and go play dota.... 


So, I will try my bestest to be moreeeeee active. Else Celine might kick me out. :x 


&here's a super good looking plate of Tonpei that you cannot find in Singapore


Signing off,
XT9A


Tuesday, May 6, 2014

Laze


Sunset at Ko Phi Phi . 

The littlest things picks you up and turns you around. If you feel discourage, there is always a lack of colour until you find the littlest thing - the spectrum A to Z . It's the littlest things that don't matter, matter. I should have given you a reason to stay, but I chose to walk away .

This is fact, not fiction, for the first time in months . Everything about us was based on my fantasy ; that voice in my head . I've been thinking lately, you don't need me anymore . And god knows, it's a common misconception that you are the one for me . I was certain about it . In fact, I could flew you to France if you asked. 

Of course, that doesn't matter anymore , because the littlest things do not exist . 


Wednesday, April 30, 2014

I love blogging -

There is no doubt in the world about that.

I started when I was barely of age to know what harm the Internet had for me and throughout my adolescent, I've created and abandoned a few online diaries of mine. You see, I've always been a pens-on person. Then in 2010, I decided that the Gemini in me needed an online sanctuary; somewhere I can rant the angsty kid in me out to the public without being/feeling guilty.

There are many reasons why I like this space. There are many reasons why people like a space like this. There are many reasons why. Here's my list, just to name a few -

1) Blogging brought me to places I never knew I'd go;


Velvet Zouk KL




Genting


Bintan


2) Met people I've never knew I'd meet;


My first group of fun lovin' blogging friends!


My first female blogging friends !


Met Ang.


Met Yuhao who I think stopped blogging.


Met HP and Clarence Kor.


Met a previous Team Singapore Bodybuilder.


Met SpongeBob.


3) Do things I've never thought I'd do;


Pose awkwardly in front of a statue overseas.


Experience Snow.


Write wishes on lantern and set it off into the air.


Went on a local amazing race adventure and won.

4) Experience food and drinks the way I've never thought I'd experience.


With a bunch of newly made friends.


Atas food on an atas setting.


First event with Oldman who enjoyed beer very much that day.

This space has not been as exciting as I would love it to be nor as exciting as it could be but it is and always will be a place I call mine. There hasn't been much on my plate when comes to blogging and I've been very peace-loving recently. But, I still do hope to continue taking up cyberspace and add more things to my list of "why I blog". I do not call myself a blogger because there are many people out there more worthy of this label. I say I am a creative individual who express herself thru a social media platform, namely blogger.

However, as I grew taller, I learnt that some things are just not meant for the WWW. With that, I am also very much in love with my white lined paper and colourful Smiggle pens. Give me that for X'mas and we will be best friends forever.

Wanna win an iPad Mini or 12-months blogging contract? You can enjoy the perks of being a Blogger too!!! Like The Influencer Network facebook page https://www.facebook.com/TheiNetwork . Join them onboard at http://www.influencersg.com/join.html (No Registration Fee) and explore your dreams of becoming a popular and influential blogger in Singapore. Be proactive and take the first step to the many opportunities ahead!

Sunday, April 27, 2014

Another one of those ..

Her eyes sparkled with distress. I should be cross with her for giving me such a fright, instead I let her into my messy but presentable home. As she picked up the dial to key in her husbands number, I decided to make a pot of tea. I reckon both of us needed one to calm our nerves . 

Sally had been my neighbor for as long as I had lived here . We hardly speak. In fact, after switching to the night shift, I did not see her around anymore. Her husband, James , travelled a lot for work. They did not have kids and Sally was a very independent woman. To have her left her keys in her car and flustering into my apartment right behind me, something was definitely not right . However, I did not want to intentionally eavesdrop. Sally would tell me once the time is right.

After what felt like forever and I was beginning to hope it was a call made locally, Sally set the receiver back on the dial and looked at me. "I'm pregnant!", Sally exploded her need with such joy and pride that my apartment was engulfed with a scent of happiness; an emotion that hasn't been emitted in a while. I was happy. Happy for my childhood sweetheart. 

Saturday, March 29, 2014

Believe VS Knowledge

People close to me would have realised the change in me. As I grew older, perhaps its the motherly instincts kicking in, I started to lose myself and became the overthinker I am today. My homies questioned me, asking where is the Celine they used to know. That strong carefree woman they knew since 17 and a half. As I search deep within myself, not only I couldnt find the answer, I start to over worry.

Today, I had the honour to sit and listen to the stud muffin who finally gave me constructive comments, telling me about Hope and Expectations.

It really does not take too long to understand how I work; what you see is what you get. I never hide who I truly am. But, to be able to understand me in such short period of time, I take my hat off Oldman. Old and wise, doesnt even fully describe him. I am thankful for his presence in my life.

As negative as I may be now, he pulls me back on the right track. I cant turn to my positive self overnight, however I am trying. I am sharing this because I am going through a difficult time, finding myself and understanding myself all over again. I mean, at 24 and a half, I finally am starting to develop armpit hairs and pimples! Wadddup, Puberty.

I've stopped writing, I know. Then, I lost myself.

Perhaps expressing myself in words is the best way to wake myself up. I got to get up, prove a point, prove people wrong, and prove myself that I am not who I am now. I am better than that. Now that I am almost done with my wake up call to myself, its time to hit the sack and await the wake up call from Oldman because I got work at 9am. I hate working in the mornings...

Friday, March 7, 2014

Agnes B - cause I can ||


Exactly a year ago, I was sourcing for a new wallet and decided on an Agnes B royal purple with gold prints wallet . The sales person told me that the gold is not imprinted, but embroidered in, therefore the gold will never fade away. A good buy, I thought to myself . Worth the money, I further encouraged myself .

Of course nothing last forever . It's not like I mistaken my wallet as a football and trashed it around, however nothing gold can stay. 

Little did I know, exactly a year later, I found myself buying yet another wallet . I happened to be at IMM and happened to walk into an Agnes B outlet store and guess what. My eyes happened to notice something red, classic and beautiful. This time, I made my own mind up. No more sales person talks on the product.


what's in the bag ?


 ahhhh ! 


is this a joke ?! 


!!!! 


what a beauty ! 








And I got it at such a steal, compared to the previous one. Although I'd like to have a compartment where I can put a photo, I didn't want to have to compromise with the number of card slots. A girl got to have tons of discount cards in her wallet at all times - you will never know when you need it . 


Goodbye old Agnes B. Hello new Agnes B. I don't even know who Agnes B is but Agnes B cause I can .

Friday, February 7, 2014

Things that I will never tell you

I am totally the man in this picture while Koh's the woman.

Coming into the 6th month of my breakup with Koh, I am reaching the stage of resentment at myself and feeling really sorry for myself. Last two nights was full of "what has become of me". At first, i get sympathy from my friends then it was pity and now, I guess I am just annoying the fuck out of them. When asked what should I do if one day I were to stop teaching, Oldman said, "Write". I pondered on it for abit and then agreed. I may not a writer to begin with, however he reminded me of how useful this tool is.

It was a tool I used to get it out of my system.

A relationship is like cooking soup; too many cooks spoil it, but when and if given too little attention, water gets evaporated into nothing. What happened between the both of us was abit of everything. There was a time where I cheated, then we both cared too much, then he cheated, then I decided to take steps back while he threw his attention at me, then there is where we are right now. Guess we just grew old too fast and instead of going out doing things people our age do, we stayed in, cuddled, and that was it. We led such a "marriage" lifestyle, I almost didn't blame him for cheating on me - I still don't.

Whereas for the longest time, I blamed it on myself. I said, to myself, that I wasn't good enough, I was just terrible, I didn't listen, I couldn't get to him 'cause I didn't try hard enough, 'cause I was lazy, 'cause I this I that.Every.Single.Day.

Given everything that happened during the years we had been together, and if we kept tabs, I am Jesus of all Girlfriends, I daresay.

Given everything that happened during the years we had been together, we both know its unhealthy if we kept on going.

Given everything that happened during the years we had been together, and I still will go back to him in a heartbeat -without any romantic gestures-, I think I am a failure, which, sad to say, I am.

Maybe, I shouldn't be reminiscing at all. Perhaps, its the period that's talking right now. Otherwise, I'd like to start on my list of Things I Will Never Tell You. After months of avoiding and hiding my feelings under my bed, this is going to be my first step of handling my breakup with Koh. Although, I never expect a day where he will stop loving me and stop being my The One, I wish him the best with the other 937873987 girls he's chasing right now.

I will never tell you how comfortable you make me feel under my skin for the first few years of our relationship. Maybe your dick just needed some actions and I was there therefore in order to get some, your natural instinct was to praise me.

I will never tell you how how much I needed you and our relationship. How our hands fit nicely into each other's and how nice it is to be with someone who never belittles me.

I will never tell you how I sometimes wonder why me. Why of all the girls in the world, you picked me.

I will never tell you that it hurts now that it is game over for the both of us. I miss my best friend everyday.

I will never tell you that I thought we were forever. Despite all the shortcomings, you are the one I love.

I will never tell you that its your face I want to wake up to every damn morning and the face I want to see before I fall asleep. Its not very handsome nor pleasant yet its the only thing I look forward to.

I will never tell you how much of a liar you are. You said I could tell you everything and anything but then, we hardly speak anymore. It's getting crazy and unbecoming of me to block you from my social media platforms just so that you would miss me too.

I will never tell you that I hate myself for caring, wallowing in self pity and not getting you out of my head. Why wasnt I enough and am I really not enough.

I will never tell you that.

I will never.