Believe VS Knowledge

People close to me would have realised the change in me. As I grew older, perhaps its the motherly instincts kicking in, I started to lose myself and became the overthinker I am today. My homies questioned me, asking where is the Celine they used to know. That strong carefree woman they knew since 17 and a half. As I search deep within myself, not only I couldnt find the answer, I start to over worry.

Today, I had the honour to sit and listen to the stud muffin who finally gave me constructive comments, telling me about Hope and Expectations.

It really does not take too long to understand how I work; what you see is what you get. I never hide who I truly am. But, to be able to understand me in such short period of time, I take my hat off Oldman. Old and wise, doesnt even fully describe him. I am thankful for his presence in my life.

As negative as I may be now, he pulls me back on the right track. I cant turn to my positive self overnight, however I am trying. I am sharing this because I am going through a difficult time, finding myself and understanding myself all over again. I mean, at 24 and a half, I finally am starting to develop armpit hairs and pimples! Wadddup, Puberty.

I've stopped writing, I know. Then, I lost myself.

Perhaps expressing myself in words is the best way to wake myself up. I got to get up, prove a point, prove people wrong, and prove myself that I am not who I am now. I am better than that. Now that I am almost done with my wake up call to myself, its time to hit the sack and await the wake up call from Oldman because I got work at 9am. I hate working in the mornings...

2013 in a nutshell

Looking back into 2013, I saw myself in different cities, in different sizes and as a whole. I fell, picked myself up, and found myself again. It was a year of growing up, not growing old. Then, I became this overthinker I never thought I'd be. Now, I am calming my tits down every other day with the help of xt9a.

Friends -
Wished I made more time for friends in person. I used to be able to make time so easily to hang and just have dinner with friends. Now, all I do is "eh lets meet up" but left it at that. I am ashamed to be one of those people. My friends got married and had kids yet I think I the only one who havent held any babies in 2013.

On the other hand, I watched my two favourite Kakaks walk down the aisle... and thats because I made time for it therefore, in 2014, I HAVE to make time. Period.

Melbourne

Beijing

 Tioman

 Bangkok

Hongkong

Travels -
I did more travelling than usual years - Melbourne, KL, Genting, Beijing, Tioman, Bangkok, Hongkong -. Surprised that I went to Bangkok only once but still, brought a whole lot of shopping back. Finally visited a non asian country and got myself a diving license. I am, forever, gonna be looking forward to exploring new places.

Relationships -
Koh and I remained as friends and I am very happy about it. It feels and seems like we have unfinished business but that is for Future Celine to care about. Oldman and I are.. the same - status unknown however I am still enjoying our sundates.

Jack and Lachie

Career -
Gave up my local students and welcomed plenty more International students. While a couple of my International students had to give me up, I got more assignments. I teared as Jackson and Lachlan were approaching the end of their academic year. So proud of the two brothers whom I taught since Lachie was in Grade 3 (He's a 5th Grader this year!) and even more touched at the amount of love they and their whole family give me. Reminded me of why I do this, how I got into doing this and who I am doing this for.

Myself -
Took up a new language - did a pretty good job, contemplating if I should do Advance in 2014. Tried to shed some pounds but gained it all back by the end of the year. I took up dodgeball again and is heavily involved in the YEC -almost like a new Celine was born after the whole fiasco with Koh. I learned new stuff, I found my mojo for old stuff and even put my foot forward in aiding the community.

2013 was fun but I wont want to go through it again. Instead of doing up a resolution and end up being sad at being unable to complete them within 365 days, I decided to do away with it this year and embrace quarter life crisis. Okay, I will add one - save - oh wait and another one - travel. I think its gonna be a challenge. Well, I am turning 25 in 5 months sooo... challenge accepted !

19 days into a brand new year, its never too late -

I drafted this entry on wednesday.

A very good morning to you. I hope your morning so far isn't as shitty as mine. This shitty morning is caused by? You may ask. I shall answer. Me.

It will started w last night. No biggie. Just another random Tuesday night where we organize/hold yet another house party. Who am I kidding? I am never that cool. Ori organized a mini surprise party for Cheng as it is his birthday at the stroke of 12. So I went, dragging my underage brother with me.

Got wasted to a certain extent. What's new? Made friends w people I haven't spoke to in the longest time. Okay, maybe not "make friends" more like reignite the friendship.

Came home. Koh started shouting at me. He went all gorillaz on me. I have no clue what was happening as I wasn't in my right state of mind. Half fucked, I slept.

Woke up after a couple of hours, with alcohol still in my body, I went to my first tutee class of the day. Sleepy and still sick with alcohol, I taught. The lesson went on for 1.5 hours which felt like forever! I swear I am never drinking on a weeknight again. Not if I have a lesson to teach.

Ive been really busy. I left my job at the student care and became a full time tutor. Besides running around Singapore, I had to also juggle with Taman Jurong CC - Youth Executive Committee stuff. I am not the Head of Publicity for nothing.

So here's the birth of our month-long effort:



That's right. Our own YouTube Channel! Do support us by subscribing to us!

One stupid woman

I think it's okay to be stupid and admit it than to pretend you don't know how stupid you are. Asking questions shows you want me to respect you and you are giving me respect. But to move my bag away from my table? Bitch, you messing with the wrong person.

First of all, you are not officially part of the center yet. I have all rights to ignore you as a being. I don't have to get along with you or even be nice. You don't have a table but need to use one,, you can jolly well use mine if asked.

Do not. I repeat. Do not motherfucking plant your ass on my chair like both of you belong together.

Secondly, I know the kids are really cute and if possible, I also want to keep them in my pockets however, refrain from trying to keep them by your side. They get to chose which teacher they like. You don't have to bribe them. You are such a fat slob, I'm surprise anyone wants you.

Thirdly, CB KIA THAT ONE MY TABLE AND CHAIR DON'T CB KIA AND PLACE YOUR BAG THERE AND REMOVE MY BAG TO A PLACE WHERE WE STORE JUNK. Please don't move my bag already then ask me if it's okay. NB YOU MOVE ALREADY THEN YOU ASK FOR FUCK? Even if you don't know that's my table, it won't kill you to asked. Besides why will I put my things in a drawer below the table if that table is not mine? Are you stupid?

Photo: CB KIA planted her ass on my chair early in the morning when she came in.

Troll

Screenshot of our OC when I was in MOM. it was my last day of Koh of course i went abit siao.

Back to the workforce

This bunch of kids make me miss mt ex bunch of kids. But this bunch makes me love teaching more.

I took the liberty of

Since I am doing away with resolutions this year, I might as well just be contented with the number of public holidays I will enjoy this year of the dragon! Because I wont be working in the government sector after the 16th (not extending my contract), I just wanted to go into the MOM website one last time!

This year so sad! Most PH falls on a tuesday, means you have to tahan one Monday at work before enjoying the PH -.-' And Chinese New Year come too quick.

Blue Sky Friday

And it's jeans day!

Xmas lunch at MOM@Kim Seng

Look at the amount of presents for everyone!

Before we start eating, Mrs Quek gave a speech.

Mrs Quek also like to match make people. If you are working under her, make sure you are attached.

EVERYONE IS Q-ING FOR?

FOOD!

This is what I got for X'mas gift exchange at MOM@Kim Seng!

RED WRAPPING PAPER! I LIKE!

It was a random thing and I dont know the person who gave it to me. But I love Lavender. I SCORED!

**********

Kenneth's Gift. Found anything funny?

WTH? BLACK PEPPER AND GINSENG??

Little red dress

There's gonna be a Xmas lunch today and I forgot to bring camera. Not like I fast faster fastest blogger in the world.

I'm wearing a red dress that I got from KL for 18SGD! thanks to fei-jie!

And my toes are red too!

Your incompetenacy is pissing the fuck out of me. I dont get how you dont understand simple instructions. Instructions that were given to the both of us at the same time had to be repeated to you by me just because you dont get it. Why is your ego so huge that you cant ask the person who is able to answer your question? Why cant you ask the damn question when instructions were given? What makes you think that I have to babysit your pride?

You are such an amazing human being, I fail to understand your existance.

Even more amazing how you managed to piss me off even when you are not in the office. If Harry Potter is real, you must be Lord Voldermot.

By the fucking way, I am not going to take your shit in anymore. So each and every fucking time you ask me again what is this and what is that, I am gonna shove them up your tiny little ass. Instead of complaining how hostile I had become, maybe you should unstitch your ears and listen carefully.

Secretly, I think you are retarded. I dont get how I understood what I am supposed to do and yet you dont. We got the same memo, tard.

I have a problem

People who do not contribute yet say things like: "Like that also I can do. Just anyhow hamtam only", ticks me off. I'm not afraid to say that I got things started. I am not the best employee neither am I the most hardworking. However, my brain works just as fine (to know that I had the effort put in).

So do away with that smirk of yours and start telling me something that I already dont know that will help us complete this task!

Dummy guide to

I have an interview on the 1st Oct. I am scared. Scared that I am not pretty enough, not skinny enough and not what they are looking for. This is the most bimbotic (in my view) interview ever and I am not about to use my intelligence to screw this up. It may or may not be a career boomz for me but definitely something I had consider doing.

As though Google is God, I actually googled on their interview tips. Not helpful but at least I am hopeful.

I havent never seen anyone like yourself. Oh my ma, how bipolar. Is being bipolar really the new indie right now? I dont know how to let you know that you are insane beyond insane.

Things I dont get, I ask. Sometimes, you bring me round in circles because your command of English is oh-my-ma-kill-me-now. Everything you say puzzle the fuck out of me and you even dare to correct my English?

Never mind all that. This boy allowed me to rant to him and I am better now.

My little happiness

Pardon the lack of entries and updates on Tumblr. I started working (yes, even before I officially graduate. I kiasu like that). I cant stand the idea of bumping around at home, looking for a job. I like to do things fast. I mean, its confirm I need to work after the diploma so why wait?

After snooping around, going for interviews for customer service, admin assistant, receptionist and teaching, I finally decide that I want to teach because it is not stagnant and its enriching. My kids are wonderful and I love them!

My afternoon class of P1.
Half of my morning class.

Reason why we gain weight after leaving primary school.

My k2 and his brother.

They are my motivation to go to work every morning and even if I OT, I gladly stay just so that everyone can be on the same pace the next day. For now, its 5 day work week and I am already looking forward to teachers day!